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Let’s roast dsmonteiro and see if his ego bruises like a grilled peach

  1. Cheetosdust
    Starting Point Expert Community Expert Jun 16, 2020

    Cheetosdust , Jun 16, 2020 :
    Roasting.jpg

    Hello everyone,

    when the opportunity to have a thread roasting @dsmonteiro arose, my mind pictured me roasting a marshmallow. After seeing his face again, my mind added “I can't believe how close I got”.

    I thought it would be a cool idea to call his friends and add more historic structure to this thread. Unfortunately, I don’t know the number to his imagination. And deserts don’t have a lot of phones around.

    Still, I can add a little geographic structure to it. @dsmonteiro is from Portugal, a country known for what surrounds it. Like his homeland, @dsmonteiro is also known for that. For example, when you see him, you automatically know the people around him are more interesting.

    It’s like @dsmonteiro is an island and the people around him are the ocean. I would choose any of the seven seas - and I don’t know how to swim. And I would also choose to literally see and talk to the ocean instead. Yes, I understand them equally, the only difference is that the horizon line is not as receding as @dsmonteiro hairline.

    If you are thinking that a place to roast a OnePlus Staff Member is something new, it isn’t. During the OnePlus 2 era, every single Staff Member was roasted. Who roasted them? I’ll clap if you guessed it correctly, but it was the device itself that did the deed. No thread necessary, just their own pockets.

    Now let’s have some fun. All these jokes should come from a good place. In @dsmonteiro case, that place would be the heart of the person next to him. And keep all the jokes above the belt, unlike the DMs @dsmonteiro keeps sending me. No, they are not “artistic” and no, testing the macro lens is not a free pass.

    Please join me in roasting a great person, one of the Staff Members with an amazing heart and soul, and the man who proudly has the Community in his head at all times. Literally. He has a hat with the word “Community” written on it. It glows so he can gloat. I asked him about it. “It’s to always be reminded of what I consult,” he replied. I was moved before I was confused by the hat with the word “Bee” next to him.

    Thank you all and a special thanks to @dsmonteiro for being such a good sport about it. Much love. Hah, just noticed I’m going to end the thread with two novelties to his life: the words “being”, “good” and “sport so close together when addressing him. Oh, the second novelty? Love.

    Now turn up the heat and roast away! :D:cool:
     

    #1
  2. YRJ
    The Lab - OnePlus 7T Reviewer Jun 16, 2020

    YRJ , Jun 16, 2020 :
    I cannot believe how much demand there was for this thread and now that this is actually happening it feels surreal. Thank you Cheetos for making this happen and the preheat, couldn't have asked for a better host. :D

    @dsmonteiro being the community consultant that he is finally agreed to roast himself. Well, I would love to say that he is a selfless person, sacrificing himself to make the community happy but as Phineas T.Barnum once said - All publicity is good publicity. :D

    Also, @dsmonteiro can you ban us? Asking for a friend.
     

    #2
  3. dsmonteiro
    Community Consultant Staff Member Jun 16, 2020


    #3
  4. YRJ
    The Lab - OnePlus 7T Reviewer Jun 16, 2020

    YRJ , Jun 16, 2020 :
    Don't think.
    tenor-33.gif
     

    #4
  5. Baymax
    Starting Point Expert Community Expert Jun 16, 2020

    Baymax , Jun 16, 2020 :
    You only think?
    SmartSelect_20200616-101103_Samsung Internet.jpg
     

    #5
  6. Dresa91
    User of the Year 2016 Jun 16, 2020


    #6
  7. harshil1903
    Jelly Bean Jun 16, 2020


    #7
    Tobikage, the_o2, buntycubal and 13 others like this.
  8. camohan
    Marshmallow Moderator Jun 16, 2020

    camohan , Jun 16, 2020 :
    This is great. The guy who roasted OnePlus is going to get roasted by Community. Karma is a B***h.

    Clap Clap Clap
    (I guess that was a decent roast DSM)
     

    #8
  9. dsmonteiro
    Community Consultant Staff Member Jun 16, 2020

    dsmonteiro , Jun 16, 2020 :
    I roast you harder than that on a daily basis. You really need to step up your game.
     

    #9
  10. camohan
    Marshmallow Moderator Jun 16, 2020

    camohan , Jun 16, 2020 :
    That's because I love you and let you feel good...!!
     

    #10
  11. dsmonteiro
    Community Consultant Staff Member Jun 16, 2020

    dsmonteiro , Jun 16, 2020 :
    Nothing that can be said will hurt me as much as people thinking that @Cheetosdust and I are one and the same. That's the worst type of roast.










    Wait, who's getting roasted again?
     

    #11
  12. YRJ
    The Lab - OnePlus 7T Reviewer Jun 16, 2020

    YRJ , Jun 16, 2020 :
    You hosted a thread to roast yourself, what's left to say?
     

    #12
  13. MosheG1
    The Lab - OnePlus 8 Pro Reviewer Jun 16, 2020


    #13
  14. B.I.T.S.
    User of the Year 2019 Jun 16, 2020

    B.I.T.S. , Jun 16, 2020 :
    You need to teach us your roasting skills @Cheetosdust you are too good at it! I think that even Mr. Serious laughed a little bits reading all your perfect roastings :cool::p

    Wait, you aren't? I thought you were just roasting yourself for the fuegoooooo calienteeeeeeee feeling :D

    [​IMG]
     

    #14
  15. SoniaB
    Nougat Head Moderator Jun 16, 2020

    SoniaB , Jun 16, 2020 :
    Where to start?

    @dsmonteiro the original D-Bag. Not to be confused with T-Bag especially during the days when he was a Lionel

    Screenshot_20200616-172103.jpg

    Or indeed the time when he wanted to be:

    That didn't last long :rolleyes:

    Now we can't get rid of him. :p
     

    #15
  16. MosheG1
    The Lab - OnePlus 8 Pro Reviewer Jun 16, 2020

    MosheG1 , Jun 16, 2020 :
    @dsmonteiro might have a receding hairline... But he definitely tried to compensate for that by growing out his beard... Oh wait that is gone too now!
    1592321146123.jpg
    (this is soooo hard why cant I think of things to rip about... Stop being such a good person! You're ruining this thread!)
     

    #16
  17. MosheG1
    The Lab - OnePlus 8 Pro Reviewer Jun 16, 2020

    MosheG1 , Jun 16, 2020 :
    @dsmonteiro you need to have just the smallest amount of importance to be roasted... That is why I won't even bother roasting you... in fact, I don't even think this thread is worth a bookmark! ([e]1f602[/e] This is the best I could come up with)
     

    #17
  18. luxuskamel
    Lollipop Jun 16, 2020

    luxuskamel , Jun 16, 2020 :
    Oh boy if I was forced to spend time in an online forum with @dsmonteiro I would make sure to never get out of our German subforum so I don't have to read the posts <3
     

    #18
  19. Baymax
    Starting Point Expert Community Expert Jun 16, 2020

    Baymax , Jun 16, 2020 :
    I could probably come up with a lot of bald jokes. It is easy to do when you have a full head of hair!

    Though I can't deny the shine of David's head. Darn it!

    Still he has no hair though.
     

    #19
  20. MosheG1
    The Lab - OnePlus 8 Pro Reviewer Jun 16, 2020


    #20